Thursday, May 29, 2008

Behind These Hazel Eyes

As I promised yesterday. I'll post the lyrics to Kelly Clarkson's "Behind These Hazel Eyes"


Behind These Hazel Eyes
Kelly Clarkson



Seems like just yesterday
You were a part of me
I used to stand so tall
I used to be so strong
Your arms around me tight
Everything, it felt so right
Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong
Now I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hanging on

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

I told you everything
Opened up and let you in
You made me feel alright
For once in my life
Now all that's left of me
Is what I pretend to be
So together, but so broken up inside
'Cause I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hangin' on

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

Swallow me then spit me out
For hating you, I blame myself
Seeing you it kills me now
No, I don't cry on the outside
Anymore...

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes



That stupid test from yesterday said that this song described my life. Well, not really. I feel more connected with the song from yesterday, Silly-go-round. But still, this is a nice song.

And yeah, my tendency to keep my troubles to myself somewhat fits the song, if only barely :P Well, I would never allow someone I care about see me cry if they're the cause. It'll hurt them more than me :D

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Silly-go-round

It all started by a junk mail from my co-worker containing a questionnaire-psychotest, which is not entirely correct, but points out that The song that defines my feelings right now is "Silly-go-round" by Fiction Junction.

And I was something like "The hell, I didn't even know the actual meaning of those lyrics." But well, with spare time and all, I decided to scour the web for a translation. After rummaging through unintelligible translation and BabelFish output, finally I found something that was quite understandable.

Here goes.


Silly-go-round
Fiction Junction YUUKA


If I could call out to you
with the same strength as my heart does
then regardless of how many people hurt me
I’ll able to take the pain

When I realize I have but little further to go
The light of dawn breaks down
the walls in front of me

As we awaken from the dream, we keep on running
all by ourselves untill we can see the dream no more
Then when I look back in confusion, the gravity
created between us will one day
pull me back to you

As I let my loneliness flow in me
hiding lies within lies
no matter how many times I may be wrong
I know this is my “Last chance for love”

Though I grow tired of seeing twilight approach
I still cry everytime I see its beauty

Knowing the goals I planned for myself
I skip past the reset button
We’re both going in circles around the same place
Relying on my own strength, I know that our gravity
will one day bring me
back to you

You and me, we’ll be together

As we awaken from the dream
we can use the dream to connect to each other
I stretch out my hand towards the
place where nobody can see or judge us
My heart and body desire more love, and
so the gravity between us
will bring them to you

As I awaken from my dream
I will reach out with my hands...



The original lyric in japanese can be found on the web easily, but in case you are lazy... This is the link

About the song itself, does it match what I'm feeling? Some of it, yes. But I guess it's just the product of my mind doing a conformation process with an ideal. In simpler words, almost any intelligible song lyric would have made some sense if you put you r mind to it. Most lyrics are quite open to multiple interpretations anyway.

Okay, that was my logical side grumbling. But well, it's a nice song, and I really like it. The lyrics are good, too. And yes, even after my logical grumbling, I confess, some of it fits what I'm feeling right now.

As a bonus, the quiz also mentioned Kelly Clarkson's "Behind These Hazel Eyes" as a song that described my life. Maybe I'll post the lyrics tomorrow if I feel like it :D

Monday, May 26, 2008

Family and Home

For this last two days, I've been talking with a friend about family, and our definition of them. For one, we agreed that blood is not always thicker than water. That we felt closer to ones that we consider 'family' because of a sharing of emotion, and not just by a relation of blood.

Truth is, I am luckier than some of my friends. I have a great blood-family, at least my mum and sis are awesome. The rest of the huge family, they're... well, mostly okay. Mostly. But still, I'm considerably quite blessed.

While we're at the topic, today I thought of something weird. While chatting away with Ipeh about meat pies and non blood-related families, an image pops to my mind. Laugh if you want. It does sounds strange.

A kitchen with Ipeh and Natsu making meat pies and Ozzi stealing freshly baked pies, and Beben laughing away at the kitchen entrance. With Ipeh threatening Oz to make him into a meat pie if he continues his blatant act of thievery. (I imagine I am also laughing, or playing MTG with Beben if I'm on the scene :D )

Sure looks fun if that image can be a reality. It would be a nice home to live in.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Name Meaning

Found a strange thing on the blogthings website several months ago. Thought I'lll put it up now :P




What Felix Means



You are loving, compassionate, and ruled by your feelings.

You are able to be a foundation for other people... but you still know how to have fun.

Sometimes your emotions weigh you down, but you generally feel free from them.



You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.

You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.

At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.



You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.

You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.

Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.



You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.



You are incredibly sexy and sensual. You have a naughty vibe that no one can ignore.

You have an unquenchable desire. And you are unrestrained in your passions.

You have a tendency to be unfaithful. Whether you fight it or give in to it is up to you.



Oh, and I tag anyone that wants to do click the link :P

Except if your name is Ipeh, which in that case, meant that you are tagged. :D

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Long Time No See.. er.. Post

First of all, sorry for the long hiatus (if anyone is reading, that is). In case anyone's wondering, this four months, I've been working. And the place where I'm working blocks several sites, such as Google sign in and all, so I can't blog. And yes, I'm too lazy to write from an internet cafe.

What about now/ well, I recently transfered to another division, which needs extensive internet access, and thus, unrestricted access to all the web. Including Google sign in.

Well, this four months, a lot have happened, and I don't really know where to start. So for now..

Let's start with a tag :D

Tagged by Ipeh.

1- Rate tens character you like, at least two weeks ago until now!

==Male===
1. Lucifer (Sandman/Lucifer)
2. Jarlaxle Baenre (Forgotten Realms - RA Salvatore)
3. Maximillian Genius (Macross)
4. Afanti (The Book and Sword)
5. Jia Xu (Ravages of Time)
6. Sanger Zonvolt (Super Robot Taisen OGS)
7. Halciet (Own DnD Character. Narcissism rules! :D)
8. June Keitou (Forsaken : Black Heaven)
9. Yoh Asakura (Shaman King)
10. Frog (Chrono Trigger)

==Female==
1. Xiao Zhao (Heaven Sword, Dragon Sabre)
2. Yuki Nagato (Suzumiya Haruhi No Yuutsuu)
3. Death (Sandman)
4. Innovindil (Forgotten Realms - RA Salvatore)
5. Li Yuanzhi (The Book and Sword)
6. Sawachika Eri (School Rumble)
7. KOS-MOS (Xenosaga)
8. Sylvanas Windrunner (Warcraft III)
9. Ibis Douglas (SRW Alpha Series)
10. Mika-Eis (Emir's DnD Character)


2- Rate 10 of your favourite games (Anime if you’re not a gamer)!

1. Dungeons and Dragons (Pen & Paper)
2. Magic : The Gathering (Trading Card Game)
3. Super Robot Taisen Alpha 3 (PS2)
4. DoTA
5. Final Fantasy Tactics (PS)
6. Disgaea (PS)
7. Fallout 2
8. Lineage II
9. Super Robot Taisen OGS (PS2)
10. Xenosaga Ep. 3 (PS2)

3- Rate your favourite song!

1. After the Storm - Bill Brown (Lineage II OST)
2. Behind these Hazel Eyes - Kelly Clarkson
3. Sakura Difference - Jyukai
4. Remember the Hill - Do as Infinity
5. Silly-go-round - Fiction Junction YUUKA
6. Forest Calling - Bill Brown (Lineage II OST)
7. I'm With You - Avril Lavigne
8. GONG - JAM Project
9. All You Wanted - Michelle Branch
10. Frog's Theme- Chrono Trigger